How to Plan Your Life
Hello, again!
I’m releasing TWO blogs this month to help you get ready for 2022!
My last blog is about how to align your to-do list with your values.
This blog takes that process and applies it to my favorite subject - PLANNING! I get more questions about planners and planning than just about anything. It’s my jam.
A word of warning: the way I plan may seem like A LOT and very regimented. It is regimented; this is because I am a (happily) busy person and I use planning to make sure I get done what I want to and - importantly - that I do not take on too much. I sometimes say yes to too many things. Planning helps inject realism into my life so that I do not underestimate how long something will take (as a neurodiverse human, I have trouble estimating time). And, honestly, I still underestimate all the time as my family will tell you.
This planning method, while seemingly regimented, actually frees me from anxiety because I build in time for things I love, time for me, and time for work. So, although it seems like a lot - it actually saves a ton of time and worry.
And, yes, it includes two planners and a separate notebook because, honestly, there is no one planner that does all the things I need it to do. Clearly, I need to create one.
Planning is a personal thing - so take from this what works for you and leave what does not.
In my last blog, I introduced you to the acronym FASO to help you align your days with your values. FASO stands for feeling, actions, support, and obstacles. If you haven’t, please read that blog and follow the FASO steps first, before you use this method of planning.
Let’s start planning!
I’m going to walk you through how I do weekly and daily planning, but the same process applies to monthly and yearly planning as well. This process essentially works like a funnel - starting with a lot of tasks/actions and continually narrowing based on what you can realistically do in any one day.
Step 1: Go back to your FASO work and look at the feelings you wrote down.
Ask yourself: How do I want to feel this week?
Write how you want to feel this week down in your planner. My beloved planner was discontinued, so beginning in 2022, I will be writing it down in a Full Focus Planner, which has ample space for writing down how I want to feel (this is how I use the goals section of the planner).
Step 2: Make an actions/tasks list that aligns with how you want to feel
Instead of to-do lists, I use task lists, which include action items that I’ve come up with in the FASO process. I mix work and home tasks because I write things down as I think of them, and it’s all one life so it feels odd to me to separate things.
I keep a running task list in a Leuchtturm1917 notebook. Note this is a running list, not a weekly list. I write every task down in this notebook as soon as it pops into my head so that I don’t forget it. There’s no organization; just a bulleted list. The organization comes later, as you’ll see below. This is the widest part of the funnel where all the tasks and actions come in.
You can also use a Leuchtturm Weekly planner for this. Or any notebook. Try not to use a bunch of stickies or slips of paper - they are hard to keep track of and get lost.
Very important: Write down tasks/actions that give you energy and tasks/actions you want to do for YOU (sleep, walking in nature, reading a novel, playing piano, anything that gives you energy) in addition to tasks you feel like you have to do. And, note the tasks you never prioritize and see whether there are any patterns.
Step 3: Inject realism
Now it’s time to narrow the funnel. How will you set up your day/week to support the actions you want to take (to help you feel the way you want to feel)?
Be brutally realistic about what you can accomplish in a week or a day. Humans tend to underestimate the amount of time it takes to do something, especially something that requires focus.
Here’s what I do. I take my long task list, and look at my week. How do I want to feel? What are the actions that will help me feel that way? And, what can I realistically accomplish in that week given what is already scheduled? If there’s something I need or want to do, but I do not have enough time to do it, I either cancel meetings, or I block time another week for that task.
Narrowing the funnel even further, repeat this for each day’s task list. Remember, I only put tasks on my daily list that I can accomplish that day.
This does three things:
It keeps my brain from losing momentum by constantly looking at an impossibly long list of tasks (because that list is in a separate notebook that I use a reference)
Finishing all my tasks gives my brain a hit of dopamine, the feel good hormone (this is called completion bias)
It keeps me from thinking about my task list at the end of the day
Note that I also do my planning for tomorrow the night before to keep me from pre-stressing about tomorrow’s task list in the evening. It’s the last thing I do before I shut down my computer and go downstairs to make dinner, which turns it into a supportive ritual.
Finally and most important, I make sure that my tasks include actions that will help me feel the way I want to feel.
Step 4: Block Your Time
Now that you’ve narrowed your tasks to what you can actually accomplish, let’s look at how to most productively use your time.
Time blocking is a very effective way to schedule focused work at times of the day when you naturally have energy for these tasks (note: if these are not tasks you actually want to do, use the Three Bs method mentioned in my previous blog).
I use Cal Newport’s Time Block Planner to plan my days (this is in addition to the Full Focus Planner (FFP), where I make my daily task lists and write down how I want to feel each day. (I know - I told you it seems like a lot, but the FFP doesn’t have enough space for time blocking).
I am pretty strict with my scheduling. For example, if I only have 30 minutes between Zooms, I schedule small tasks like checking email or making quick calls. I block longer periods of time for focused work (and only in the morning, when I’m naturally most focused).
It works best for me if I schedule the whole day so that I know when I’m working out, when I’m meditating, when I am stepping outside for a walk, when I’m writing and when I’m on Zoom or completing tasks like checking email. This article has some good visuals so you can see what it looks like. Time blocking has helped me better understand how long tasks take - not my natural wheelhouse. This understanding has made a very big difference in what I commit to doing.
Step 5: Plan to Fail
You will have bad days. This will go haywire. You will lose control of your schedule. You will get sucked into something unplanned. You will need to spend time putting out fires instead of on actions that give you energy. Something will take approximately 10,000 hours to write when you budgeted two hours.
Know that this will happen and have a plan for getting back on track. Below are some tools to help.
Cultivate Self-Compassion: Speak to yourself kindly. Know that you are human on a planet of humans. Things happen. It’s okay. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, or that you can’t stick to things, or that everyone is terrible. When you skid off course, try speaking to yourself as you would your best friend, and remind yourself that these things happen to humans.
The same is true for times when you realize how much you’re doing for other people, or how afraid you are of being too big. Give yourself a hug and congratulate yourself on recognizing your limiting beliefs. That helps decrease the pull they have on you.
Liberally apply boundaries (see here for more on boundaries): Let’s say a work colleague asks to meet during one of your time blocks. Instead of dithering, feeling guilty, and agreeing to meet, you simply say, “No, I’m sorry. I can’t meet at that time.” or “That’s not open on my calendar” or “No.” As Oprah says, “No is a complete sentence.”
Use Turtle Steps: When a task or action seems overwhelming, even if it’s one you know will lead you closer to feeling the way you want to feel, use the Martha Beck tool of breaking it into Turtle Steps. Turtle Steps are the very smallest step towards something. I use Turtle Steps every day to move closer to my goals. For example, in writing this blog, I worked on it for 30 minutes a day over several days. I still completely underestimated the amount of time it would take me, but every day I moved closer to finishing it.
Done is Better than Perfect: Do the thing and then STOP. Turn it in. Put it down to read later. Move it to the next step in the process. As a recovering perfectionist, this adage has helped me drop my perfectionist anxiety and do the damn thing.
Okay! Have I overwhelmed you, or do you feel more prepared for 2022? I hope it’s the latter. If not, break this down into Turtle Steps. Start with FASO from my previous blog. Then make an action/task list. Then use it to plan one day. Then another. The more you do it, the easier and faster it gets.
Happy Planning!
Wishing you a very happy 2022!