Breathe

Wow. It has been a rollercoaster of a year. 

From immense joy to gutting despair, our world has been on quite a journey - to put it mildly. 

If you just aren’t feeling it this holiday season, that’s okay. Go with it; do less and rest more. 

And if you are, well, go for that too. Feel the joy. Soak in it and let it fortify you. And also rest more. Please don’t forget that.

Through all the ups and downs this year, I’ve noticed something in myself - I forget to breathe. Yep, I am a certified meditation teacher and I find myself holding my breath when I’m stressed. 

Have you ever had this happen? Experiment with me. Close your eyes and check in - are you breathing right now? Is it deep or shallow? Next time you’re stressed, check in and see if you’re still breathing, or perhaps subtly holding your breath (that’s what I do).

Why Breath Matters

Our breath isn’t just what keeps us alive, it’s essential for all sorts of things, like oxygenating our entire body and nervous system. 

Breathing is controlled by our autonomic nervous system - that’s the system that controls automatic things like breathing, blood pressure and digestion. It’s divided into the sympathetic nervous system, which handles our response to stress, or our flight or fight response, and the parasympathetic nervous system, which is sometimes called the rest & digest system because it’s responsible for things that happen when you’re resting, like sleep and digestion.

Then there’s a long nerve that runs from your head to your gut called the Vagus nerve, or wandering nerve because it touches so much of your torso. It connects your brain to several of your organs and your gut. When you hear about the gut-brain connection, this is the nerve that controls those signals. 

When your perceived stress level is too high, your vagus nerve will slow communication between your brain and your internal organs. This can speed up or slow down your heart rate and breathing, give you diarrhea or constipation, create a tingling in your fingers or toes, give you brain fog, and in general gum up the works. 

The great news is you can bring these systems back into alignment by breathing, mindfully and on purpose. 

When you breathe slowly and deeply in and out of your nose, you send signals for your vagus nerve and your autonomic system to relax. This allows your parasympathetic nervous system - the one responsible for resting and digesting - to come back on line and do its job to calm things down. 

Your breath helps to connect you back into your body. 

When we’re connected to our bodies, we can hear what they’re telling us. Your slight headache might be telling you it’s time to stop looking at screens, or the heat in your face might signal that you’re getting angry, the tension in your shoulder might indicate you are feeling stress (these are all my real life examples). Your body is telling you all sorts of things all the time. Reconnecting with it allows you to hear it. And tuning in to those signals helps you understand yourself better. And isn’t that what this is all about?

So here’s a little practice to use our breath to reconnect to our bodies. Use this liberally this holiday season - when your mom says that thing that takes you back to high school, when you’re trying to mail a gift and the wait is 25 people long, when you read another horrible, hateful thing that orange idiot said. Stop. Tune in. And breathe.

Here’s how it goes.

A Practice for Connecting to Breath

Close your eyes, if you can. You can also do this with your eyes open; but try to have a soft, unfocused gaze - unless you’re driving!

Look for your breath in your body. 

Are you breathing? 

How do you know you’re breathing? 

Where do you feel it?

Focus on the point where you feel your breath - that might be your chest, your belly or your throat. All of those are perfect; don’t try to change anything. 

Now focus on your feet. Feel them solid on the earth, or in your chair or wherever you are. Try to breathe in and out from your feet through your whole body. Do this for 30 seconds, or as long as you’d like.

Come back to your breath and slowly open your eyes.

Feel any different? If you feel calmer, maybe a bit clearer, or even tired, that’s your parasympathetic nervous system waking up and clearing out some of the stress. 

Well done! 

My friends, I am wishing you all good things this holiday season. Use this practice whenever you need it, and I can’t wait to be back with you in 2024!